David Bartholomae: Inventing the University

Inventing the University, written by David Bartholomae has a way of upsetting nearly every college student who reads it. His words make the average student feel fairly helpless in this academic world full of such high expectations and forced (faked) authority. In this article, he constantly reiterates that the university invents the voice every student must adopt in order to succeed. He states that every student who experiences a higher education must fake authority in order to flourish in their field and succeed in the university setting.

Every major and every field of expertise has a designated voice, full of authority and knowledge; which the university expects students, who are far from knowledgable in their field, to adopt. In short, the students must try to appear as though they are a highly experienced member of their field in order to succeed, and must take on the voice that is determined by the University and set as a standard for all students. In this process set by the University itself, students tend to lose a level of individualism and creativity.

In this world that is overly focused on faked intelligence and following the standard set for all students, uniqueness is frowned upon, and conformity is a must. This is why I feel that Inventing the University is highly detrimental to the educational community and banishes students backwards in their education rather than propelling them forward. Faking expertise does not contribute to the learning experience of each student; it simply forces them to learn that they must fake intelligence and confidence in their field, while still leaving them clueless to the actual facts they are required to learn.

Inventing the university is not a stepping stone on the road to success and authority in one's field, rather it is a flame thrower, destroying all individuality and pressuring the student to fake a farther knowledge that they had thusforth obtained. This standard set by the University forces students to live in a "make-believe" world in which they are all highly experienced experts, and the highest authority known in their field. It is detrimental to the educational community and forces a conformity among students that frowns upon individuality and creativity in one's work, especially writing. In my opinion, Inventing the University is something that students should ignore, overcome, and use only in extrenuating circumstances, it is the student that should master education and the university, not the other way around.

audio feedback reaction

I found the audio feedback provided by my professors in regard to my symposium was surprisingly helpful. I found their oral comments more specific than the written comments I usually recieve with my papers, and touched on specific points as they progressed through the essay. Normally the written comments I recieve on my completed papers are vague and general due to a limit of writing space as opposed to the specific comments provided by my professors. While it was a bit strange to be talked at and scolded to a degree I found it generally more helpful and enlightening than the typical comments I have recieved in the past. They, for the most part, aligned with the criticisms of my peers during the editing session held in class, and reiterated that I needed to research a bit more before completing my final draft.

Myers vs. North/Brooks

Myers acknowledges that the best form of tutoring is minimalist tutoring, but states that ESL students will have a more difficult time taking direction regarding their writing and require more attention than the average student. She also says that "sentence level" corrections may actually improve ESL students as writers, and help them better understand the phrasing and sentence structure utilized in the language they are struggling to learn. This differs from the opinions of Brooks and North because they believe that the main focus should be on the writer and that the tutor should be more focused on the structural and content problems rather than spending time on sentence structure and simple language errors. They would be angered by this abandonment of minimalist tutoring and general focus on editing rather than tutoring. However, although these two intellectuals may disagree with this take on tutoring, it is highly necessary to focus on the small, grammatical issues on the paper in order to further submerse these foreign students into the mannerisms and phrasings used in this new and scary language.

fake authority?

I have been a professional water polo player for fourteen years now. I am the main offensive attacker on the US olympic team, we are training to compete in the 2012 summer games. People often tell me, water polo is an easy sport, that I should choose something with a wider fanbase and higher set of skills required. I respond to these pessimists and judgemental wussies by simply stating that water polo requires more agility and stamina than a fast paced basketball game. Water polo players must keep afloat throughout the entire game, one foot on the floor could cost us a huge penalty and lose us the game. Hours of treading water can be trying on the inexperienced swimmer, and so I train by doing laps with my team for a minimum of three hours every day. Even more challenging than staying afloat is propelling oneself upwards towards the ball with no sturdy ground to push off of. Our team follows a strict regimen of conditioning activities and intense excercise in the water every day. We are sure to take the gold two years from now and avenge our loss in the 2008 games.

Fulwiler

In his article, Fulwiler touches on four main suggestions peer tutors can make in order to help their peer's paper improve, even when all other comments fall flat. These ideas which can be suggested are limiting, adding, switching, and transforming.



1) Limiting: focusing your writing on a specific subject. Avoid any vague phrases, and keep your writing goal oriented, focusing on the thesis and keeping sentences relevant and specific to the subject at hand.



2) Adding:

3) Switching: switching the point of view of the paper at hand to give it a more exciting twist. (ie. change from 1st to 3rd person) this can give the paper a new fresh flow and can sometimes show new activities throughout the story if shown from another person's eyes.

4) transforming:

Symposium peer tutoring session

I feel like I benefitted greatly from the peer tutoring session held with my classmates Maggie and Stephanie regarding my symposium essay. They helped me to weed out unnecessary dialouge, and pointed out when a specific line didn't sound like the writer I was assigning it to. Maggie and Stephanie helped my paper to adhere a more natural dialouge flow and corrected me when my ideas about some of the facts (particularly about Lundsford) were a bit off. I was having a more difficult time providing valid recommendations concerning their papers. Being inexperienced in symposium-like papers, I found it astoundingly difficult to find helpful suggestions to make. However, after listening to their comments I found it a bit easier to pick out problematic points in this type of writing. Hopefully, if faced with a symposium paper while working at the writing center, I will recall the same lessons I learned today.

The Cause of Crime: from the perspective of a professor

The first paragraph of this essay needs to be jam-packed with information. A good introduction to a paper provides an attention grabbing opening, a thesis,and a short summary of what will be covered in paragraphs to come. This introduction had none of the above. The thesis "The three factors that were blamed for creating criminals are the environment, genetics, and theself"is the only factual based sentence in the entire paragraph and even that should be a little more detailed. This paragraph needs more info, and as Fulwiler would say, needs limiting.

The next few paragraphs improve significantly from the lackluster introduction but still lack limitation. For example, the opening of the second paragraph "From the day someone is born until the time of their death, this individual must have interactions with the world through different methods" is extremely vague. These paragraphs also lack proper citing, the book is mentioned but no page numbers. This essay is clearly set up in the typical high-school 5 paragraph format, but as a college student, moreinformation is required, try adding a few more paragraphs by expanding on genetics or the criminals ability to feel regret for another paragraph or two. You could even try to find one more example in the reading to further back up your thesis.

The final paragraph is entirely too short. There is no way upwards of five paragraphs could be summarized in three short sentences. Compare your new, information packed intro and try to mirror the information in the conclusion paragraph.

Overall, I would give this student a C-/D+. The student clearly researched and attempted to complete the assignment, but the paper lacks a complex structure and is starved of information. A more complete introduction and conclusion, and the insertion of more facts and another key point in the body of the essay would greatly benefit the overall validity of this paper.